At Least We're Trying

I am feeling a little better now. It was a tad bit rough but I’ve gotten through it with the help of my closest friends and changing my mental to see things in a different perspective. It’s all about pulling yourself out that darkness. Take it from someone whose dwelled there for years, you’ll begin to get the strength to not dwell on the things you can and cannot change, and pull yourself out the rabbit hole. During this state of mind, I focused on dissecting my big goals and turning them into smaller ones so it wouldn’t feel so overwhelming. I wrote everything down and broke them into little steps; most importantly in what I COULD CONTROL. Therefore, I am currently putting my energy towards those things.

After I spent time sorting things out, a thought came to me while I was talking to a friend who was explaining the concept of death to his two younger children. He just so happen to catch a head cold and they were scared for his life (they were worried because COVID). He simply explained that everyone dies. More specifically he said, “We live to die.” It struck a memory of an Instagram video I’ve seen with motivational speaker/tech investor/ everything else that involves money tycoon, Garvy V. He gave the best advice to a girl that caught him on the street before getting into his car. He told her, “You’re going to die!” Simple. That did something to me, but this time, I believe it had much more of an impact. It made me realize how much we as humans complicate life to the point that we’re feeling as if we’re losing our minds.

This inevita

ble concept made me think about all the useless bullshit I was worrying myself about; fortune, iffy friendships, the future. The only thing that is important right now, is now! Whatever you do now will either catapult you into your destiny or ruin your future. But, this is if your living your life positively, then positive things will come will be the outcome and vice versa. None of knows what they future holds so I feel that it’s best to do the whatever makes you happy in the now. I have been thinking a lot about going home to Cleveland for a little while. The love from my family and friends is well needed at this point. Two months ago when I visited, it felt good to have somewhere to go back too and start with a fresh mindset, but now, the compass inside myself is pointing to go back home again. I’m not sure how long I would stay, nevertheless, I know that I will be moving again. Sitting in one place for long periods of time gives me anxiety to experience new places the world has to offer. Just from really thinking about what I really want out of this world, I am not meant to stay still. I gets parts of that from my father. He bounced around a lot and tried different things. The only difference with me is I wish to go abroad and possibly, find some place to settle down for a few years.

It’s still a process. A negative mindset has been my best friend for years. It takes a while to re-program your sub-conscious to become more positive and optimistic. Saying affirmations help a lot, sun gazing, and water believe it or not. I did all that today and feeling much better. The key is to do this everyday and see where it takes you. After a while, it is said that your body will re-program itself into thinking more positively and your whole molecular make up will basically revamp itself into a healthier you. I know I've mentioned this a couple times before, but, I really need to do this. I'm tired of feeling the way I do and going through life without the clarity I need. We'll see where this goes. I'll give an update next week. Until next time...

(Try to) Stay Positive. (Try to) Stay Focused. (Try to) Vibrate Higher (No Pressure). Peace